Friday, March 03, 2006

What must people think?

I promised you pictures, and here is one. DD insisted her stuffed puppy needed a dress. Who was I to argue? I made the pattern myself using measurements from the toy and a test swatch for gauge. The edging is crocheted on, I just winged it. Doing things like knitting sweaters for stuffed puppies illustrates a good point. I know I am odd, and I often get looks and eye-rolls and things from other people. I like to say I am unappreciated in my own time, and if I were born earlier I would have fit right in. Those unsold good-for-you chocolate chip cookies made with whole wheat flour from the bake sale? Those are mine. The carrotcake cupcakes that the kids each took one bite of and left (I mean, who doesn't finish a cupcake?!?!)? Mine. Those 100 percent juice boxes that sit untouched when the kool-aid jammers are gone? Yes, I brought those too. I make lasagne with tvp, heat chocolate soy milk and call it "hot chocolate", and make pie crust with whole grain flour and no trans fats. I do these things because they actually taste good, not because I am a nut. But it's hard to get people to try things. I am the only crazy mom around here that won't let her kid have artificial sweeteners (not even in gum) and think sports drinks are evil. Sometimes I lose these fights, even in my own home. My husband and daughter don't eat vegetables. I can't even call them "meat and potato eaters" because they are picky when it comes to meat, and suspicious of potatoes. Mashed, or nothing. And I make crappy mashed potatoes (I don't mind lumps, I have to strain them three times for those two critics and even then they complain). They will eat my rice as long as I don't put anything in it, and they will eat pasta as long as there are no vegetables in the sauce. They would prefer frozen chicken nuggets and rice-a-roni, and sometimes I relent. But they have to bake the nuggets - no deep frying here. Recently DH decided it would be okay for DD to have kool-aid jammers to bring in her lunch. Blue ones. Do you know what happens to blue dye as it passes through the body? It turns bright green, that's what. And little kids that don't drink sugary things often get the runs when they do. Bright green runs. When said child does not wipe certain things for herself yet, this means I have to be personally involved and now I am ticked off with myself for not maintaining my ground on the whole kool-aid thing. Not to mention the loads of laundry added due to "gas incidents" when young children get the runs. We won't get into the fanny soaking when poor tushies get sore from bright green runny poops. TMI? Well too bad. My life is TMI ;). The first time DD was ever sick, she threw up techni-colour. This child was not SICK as in with the flu, somebody thought that froot-loops were the same as cheerios and let her eat her fill. I say this is proof that some of this stuff is not good for eating. If our bodies reject it, that should be a clue! Sure, they get used to it over time and are soon enough able to eat those things for breakfast (who can eat something so sweet, so artificually fruity, first thing in the morning? *gag*). But think about it this way. The first time a person smokes or takes certain drugs they get sick. Over time, they don't get sick anymore because they become used to it. Used to these poisons. My daughter ate froot-loops and got sick. I don't WANT her to get "used" to them! I guess since I don't like these things I don't feel I am depriving my child of anything. She still will not drink soda. We never gave it to her, as I felt no child needs to drink pop when there was water, milk, juice available. When she was finally old enough to ask for it, she hated it. I see babies drinking pepsi out of sippy cups and it makes me cringe. We have been places where the sole drink option for the kids was soda. When I explain DD does not drink soda I get those looks again! At a recent meeting at the school, I made a suggestion that on special food days, they list carrots and dip as a choice alongside the usual potato chips and the inevitable kool-aid jammers. Another parent was quick to point out that my own child doesn't eat carrots. I agreed, but felt that many parents whose kids DO eat the carrots might like having the choice. Since the food is ordered ahead of time, only ordered items are bought so what do they have to lose? A supply company offered small containers of veggies (a couple baby carrots, a piece of celery, a slice of cucumber, and a few grape tomatoes) with dip for 1.00 each. That is an excellent price. The council decided that nobody would pay more than 1.00 for veggies if they can get the chips for 50 cents (with a healthy profit margin), so set the price at cost. Besides, nobody would be nutty enough to order was pretty much to shut me up. More than half the students ordered the veggies. While this is a GOOD thing in my eyes when it comes to health issues (obesity and onset of typeII diabetes in youth) it also meant that the school made no money on those orders, and in effect lost money because otherwise the chips would have sold. Boy, that didn't help the looks I get when I show up in my knitted coat. To compound all of this, my child is a nutbutt. She says funny things at inopportune moments (like many children do). Like telling one boy her dad was going to "squeeze his head". And wouldn't you know who sat next to him on the bus during the field trip? The poor boy was scared witless all day, thinking my husband was going to squeeze his head. DH is not a head squeezer, nor has he ever done that do DD, but she said it and now the kid was afraid of him. It was finally cleared up at the END OF THE TRIP. A whole day of terror, poor child. This morning as we were waiting for the bell to ring, DH muffled a belch and said "Excuse me". In a very loud voice, DD said "Daddy, are you burping liquor AGAIN?". Brought the playground to a screeching halt, it did. While DH has been known to have a rye and ginger or two on a special occasion, he is by no means a drinker. To which point if he has a single beer in the summer DD will ask if he is drunk. She doesn't really know what that means other than what has been mentioned on some tv shows (people talk and walk all funny and people laugh, according to her). And a single beer certainly would not inebriate a person of DH's size. I asked DD if she even knew what liquor was. "You know. Beer and wine". When have you seen daddy drink beer and wine? "He drinks beer when he barbeques. And we have wine in the basement. He goes down there a lot. I think he drinks it down there". So we had a bit of a talk before she started school to clear this all up. She gets it now, but I shudder to think what she says when we are not there. Once, DH walked by with his shirt off (summer, AC not on yet) and DD gleefully informed my sister (on the phone) that "Daddy is naked". And I still can't look at the gas bar attendant in the eye, after DD declared I was in fact not wearing underwear. We were on our way to go swimming, I had my bathing suit on under my jeans, and no I didn't have actual underwear on, but still. I would stop going there, but the price is the lowest around and I am cheap. What is personal embarassment when you can save a couple of cents per liter? Another time she asked if a waiter would like to see my bra. "What? It's really pretty!". Makes me tempted, when I get one of those looks, to ask 'are you looking at me like that because I am just odd, or because my daughter said something and now you think I am odd?'. And I would ask, if I didn't think it might just make things worse. Here is the second picture. More knitting. Hey, I said I would post pictures. I never said they would be exciting. I have never knitted lace (never really knitted much of anything - yet) so I wanted to practice a bit. I don't want to waste expensive lace weight, so I'm using some leftover sock yarn. I am intrigued by the idea of a wrap that is light as air and not overheating, yet provides warmth and cover when needed. Perfect when the AC is on just a bit too high in a restaurant or light summer breezes. The stitches themselves are easy enough, but every time I get distracted I forget where I am in the repeat. I have ripped it back completely a few times because finding my place was hopeless. This is knitting for when I am alone and the house is quiet, for sure.


Beth_in_TX said...

Dances, you are a woman after my own heart. I call myself a latter-day-hippy. I'm too young to actually have been a hippy, but I would have been a great one. :-)

Anonymous said...

Dances, your family cracks me up. Thank you for standing up to the school for some healthy food!! I totally agree with you about all the crap you won't let your DD eat, and I can't believe the school would rather the kids eat garbage than veggies because of a few cents! You are a good mom.

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