Friday, September 01, 2006

I am so, so sorry.

I have to make an apology to every single person in North America. Well, at least Canada. Perhaps maybe just Ontario - I'm not sure how wide my sweep should be. You see, I have known for a long time that gas prices had an invert relationship with my gas gauge. That is to say, the more gas is in my tank, the lower the price at the pump. Conversely, the more dire my need for gas in my tank, the higher prices soar. My husband can fill his tank, tell me prices are low, I can run out to fill mine, and darned if it didn't jump up ten cents! Dh came home once and complained that the price of gas went up eleven cents overnight when he needed a fill up. I apologized, since I was running on fumes and getting gas was pretty urgent, I am sure this is what caused the hike. Not a hurricane or leak in an oil line, not oil fires or wars or trade embargos. The fate of the state of oil and gas prices rests inside my 1994 Ford Escort. Finally he made a suggestion, that instead of watching my gauge go down and watching the gas prices and fretting, I should just drive in a zen state, and "sneak up on the pumps". This meant no stating, or even thinking "I need to get gas". I wan't sure how that would work, I mean if I stop keeping track of the gas gauge wouldn't that increase the chances of me running out completely? And knowing what we know about the connection between my engine and the prices, wouldn't that guarantee a jump at the pump to like four dollars per litre? I don't even want to think about what that would be a gallon. Locally we have been enjoying a drop in gas prices, first time they came below 90 cents in a long time. I say "we" figuratively because I had no faith that I would get to share in that price. Yesterday I was driving along, saw a station advertising 86 cents per litre, and glanced at my dial - a little less than a quarter of a tank. Good time to fill up, good price, HEY! I think I just sneaked up! I quickly pulled in and filled my tank before they could push me down on the way to changing the sign again. My car coughed and panicked a little as I was filling, considering I haven't let the pump go until it turned off on it's own in like two years - poor thing probably thought I was trying to drown it. I kept looking around, figuring maybe it was some kind of trick. Or waiting for a truck to come careening in and take out the pumps. Or an air craft to dump a shipment and have it land right on the station or something. But no. I filled up, paid the bill, and drove out safely. The only theory I have for this, is I must have happened upon a rip in the time-space-continuum that allowed me to circumvent the normal forces that surround me, and keep my gas gauge and the economy in their negative relativity. There can be no other explanation. Now of course, by the time I left the station, the next one down the street had already risen it's price to 94 cents, and that is where the prices hover today. Dh had to fill up this morning, and boy was he cursing at me. I tried to tell him where to drive to get that rip, but he wasn't listening to it. Too bad for him ;).

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