Thursday, February 15, 2007

Perpetual lateness sucks rocks.

My parents are always late. Not a "reliable" late. My oldest sister is reliably late. She and her family will appear two hours past the time things are supposed to start. TWO HOURS. It is irritating and upsetting and annoying, and we have learned to tell her a time two hours before we really want her there. And she will get suspicious and call around and we all know about this and lie and say we were told the same time she was. It is a system. Usually it works, sometimes it fails. Christmas it failed big time as she was FIVE hours late. One can only do so much. My parents are usually late but one never knows by how much. More than once we have been sitting in a restaurant waiting, and get a phone call to find out they are still shopping in the States, and two hours from the restaurant if they were to be on the way to the tunnel now (and they usually are calling from Meijers or Target, definitely not on the way to the tunnel). Please do not ask me to meet you for dinner, then go shopping in the States and leave me sitting there like an idiot, with a famished DH and DD - seeing as it is usually already an hour or two past their regular dinner time. Last night my father had invited us to dinner to celebrate Valentine's day as well as my mother's birthday (which is on the 16th). What a lovely idea. We don't have to plan a valentine's dinner that neither of us are in the mood for (romance is a sham when your heart is not in it) and the plans for mother's birthday are done. Great! Only there we were, sitting at a table for 11. Just the three of us. For almost 20 minutes. Then my paternal grandmother showed up, and we all know how lovely I find encounters with her lately. We got to listen to another 20 minutes of complaining that my parents were late, and how my mother was always a bad seed, and how my husband is bald and my daughter is hyper and loud and my dog is ugly and I would be so pretty if only I weren't so fat. If I had known she was coming I could have worn my t-shirt and saved her some valuable breath, and she could have used that time to complain about the restaurant (cold, noisy, dark, too crowded) and the food (greasy, salty, spicey - although she ate five plates of it) instead of doing so WHILE she was eating. Then my reliably-late sister showed up. And it was another ten minutes or so before my parents walked in (with my maternal grandparents in tow). My other sister is in Mexico and my brother had other plans, so this was it. The food was GOOD. At least what I ate. If one does not like greasy food then one should take more care to choose items that are not deep fried. And that is all I will say about that LOL. The dinner turned out fine, but I really was irked about the lateness part. I am not feeling well (the itching is back full force after it looked like it might clear up, and I think I am coming down with something else. I am stuffed up, feel like somebody is standing on my brain, and my lungs are burning. Not congested yet, but they sort of feel hot. Like I have been jogging, only I haven't). If I had known they were going to be late and had invited you-know-who and my brother was not coming (I wanted to give him the hat, which we affectionately call "Shortie" LOL) I think I would have opted to stay home instead and just visit with them on another day. But what is done is done. We gave my mother a big box of her favourite Laura Secord chocolates, and had chocolate covered marshmallow hearts to go around for everybody else. Some sugar free chocolate for my dad (Gee, thanks he said, rolling his eyes LOL. He hates getting "special" chocolate and baked goods because they taste like crap). Now. I have to ask something. Let's say somebody gives you a small candy gift for a holiday. Nothing major, just say maybe a chocolate covered marshmallow heart. And you are not into chocolate or sweet things. Do you accept the candy and thank the giver, put the candy in your purse and give it to one of your kids later on. Or do you give it back and say "I hate candy. I don't want this"? I can add a new annoyance with "Miss-two-hours-late-for-her-own-life". Since last easter, she has been bouncing back gifts. And it is teaching her kids a bad thing, because one of her kids did the same thing at Christmas with one of HER gifts. Never mind she specifically ASKED for that gift, but that is another matter. Perhaps she saw the brand name and knew it was more than a little dollar candy. Perhaps she figured it would be better off going to somebody else that would enjoy it. But I think there are better ways to convey that than to wrinkle her nose and have it passed back to me. There. Gripe done. DH and DD were thrilled to get their own marshmallow, and each got their own little valentine card. I did that and I made sure DD got cards and candy for her friends at school, and I figure my part is done. Now I don't have to worry about so much as a birthday until Easter.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Girl... are you sure you can't move away from these people? Sheesh.. what a bunch of ungrateful snobs... [next time just pass around a basket/bag to 'share' all of the same.. except for your dad's although the Whitman's sugar free isn't bad stuff.. With your 2 hr late sis -- quit with the lies & just tell her that no one will be waiting for them to show up.. you're eating at X time. Coming 5 hours late & expecting people to be waiting is sooooo beyond rude that I cannot believe it.. Why be the enabler of such rudeness.. PS does she have a job? obviously not because I don't know of one where you can show up 2-5 hours late every day...

DancesInGarden said...

Don't let me give you the impression I sat there with a smile and didn't say anything! About the lateness, especially. She knows how I stand on that. If it had been my "do" we would have started eating when we got there.

gardengrl (from the cf) said...

I agree with Anon. You sure you wouldn't rather come back down here to Florida? The weather is really nice now (albeit "cold" for us!).

I'd stop giving the snobby sister gifts altogether. Don't waste your time or money on unhealthy, unapreciative people, or as I read recently from a self-help book, "never have a relationship with the devil." :-)

Sorry you're feeling poopy Dances; hope you're better soon!