Monday, April 02, 2007

Running hot and cold

The breeze is cool, and I have the windows open. I sit at the computer desk and freeze. If I close the windows, it gets stuffy because the sun is bright out there. My brain is going to warp, if it keeps going from cold to hot to cold to hot. And we all know, I can't stand a brain more warped than it is now. I heard a radio announcement today. It said that there is evidence that the war on obesity may start in the womb. IN THE WOMB. That means before I was even born, cosmic forces were working against me and making me fat. How does one fight against such villainy?? Where does a person stand, when every day there is more proof that the universe is against her? We all know I don't have a gene pool but rather a mud puddle, from which the universe dipped a cup full of whatever was available. Some people say that the powers that be created us from clay. If they mean that dirty, waxy clay you find when you dig too far in the sand, then maybe. Now. I have always figured that maybe I was a very bad girl in a past life. That the express purpose for THIS life was to burn off a little karma. This is just further proof. I have to get blood tests tomorrow. I am planning a 17 hour fast. Since I have an appointment tomorrow morning for something else, I won't be free until about 11:00am. So, I can not eat or drink after 6:00pm tonight. Which is fine. But I never know if I am allowed to take my medicines. If I am taking medicines to control blood sugar and cholesterol, and take tests while not on the meds, what exactly are we measuring? We KNOW I need them. Dr. says we do the test to see if the meds are doing their job. If that is the case, is it not better to do the test WHILE I am taking the medicine? The people at the lab, the people at the dr's office, they all look at me like I have lost my mind. "That is not how it is done". Sure. And we know how well the REGULAR way works for every other thing in my life, why would we think the regular way would work now? Sheesh. How many times do I have to tell these people I am SPECIAL. From the WOMB special. My mother would be very proud, but I won't tell her. She already has a martyr complex, we wouldn't want her to start wearing a blue scarf on her head and forging stigmata using lipstick (taken directly from an Ab Fab episode, and yes, it made me laugh like a loon. More of that karma to burn off later. My next incarnation is going to be in a very very bad way, methinks).


JenTX said...

***tapping foot***

Today is Thursday Mz. Dances! I NEED my Dances update!

OK, I know I've been unusually quiet. I've peeked in and didn't leave a comment. I haven't been feeling particularly witty and your blog just screams for wit!

Love you and your little dog too.


JenTX said...

Just checking in. It's Friday afternoon. We're having a lovely but cooler day. Sunny and 62° which may seem warm to those up North but a welcome relief from the 80's we were having.

How YOU doin' Dances? (said in my best "Joey from Friends" voice) lol

Poops said...

First of all, I laughed out loud at your mother's martyr complex. I know I shouldn't, I don't even know the woman, but still.

And won my blog contest! Yay for you!

Swing by and email me your address so you can get your Major Award!

Anonymous said...

Sure hope all is okay. I keep checking back for updates and know you were having some tests.