Friday, June 08, 2007

I am not ready for the truth

While cleaning the downstairs bathroom today (shut up. Even I clean things once in a while), I saw something around the toilet. Well, some THINGS. Things that looked suspiciously like mouse poop. Uh oh. I grapped a clorox wipe and wiped them up, then did a closer inspection. What a minute, those aren't mouse droppings! Those are.....sniff sniff......cookie crumbs. Now, the knowledge that we may have a mouse problem would have been daunting enough. But finding cookie crumbs mean a truth that is much, much worse. Somebody Has Been Eating In The Bathroom. Possibly. While. On. The. Toilet. There is no word, no bolding, no font dire enough to convey my feelings on that sentence. Lexapro my arse, I'll need a truckload before THAT thought ceases to make me want to drink bleach. Suffice it to say I had to dig very deep to stifle the urge to go running and screaming from the house, arms flinging in wild circles while my mind short circuits. Carry on about your day, while I have a nervous breakdown in the closet.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

What's for dinner?

Decisions decisions. Do I actually make dinner, or do I feign death and hope they fend for themselves? I think I understand know why victorian women had so many fainting spells. It had nothing to do with tight corsets and arsenic habits for lily white skin - it was to get out of housework. "What was that? What's for dinner? Oh my, I am feeling faint.....". I actually like to cook. But there are days when I just cannot face the idea of cooking another lump of protein and pile of starch for the blandness twins. No colour on the plate, no flavour in the food, no inspiration nor freshness. Boring. So here I sit, nothing defrosted, no ideas for sides. But I DO know that MY meal will be accompanied with red and yellow peppers, some cherry tomatoes, and a veggie mix of snap peas, broccoli, and carrots. Heck, I guess I will make chicken. Everything tastes like chicken anyway, right?

Monday, June 04, 2007

One less baby bird in the world

While I was bringing DD to school, something invaded the bird house next door. The results of the raid were sitting on my lawn when I got back - a dead baby bird that is basically ripped apart. Ew! Poor thing. It doesn't look like what a cat would do, so I assume it was a starling or seagull or other bird. I left it where it was for now, in hopes that whatever dropped it might return and take it's meal. If not, I will go out and remove it later, and bury it in the garden. I am all for circle of life lessons, but leaving a dead bird to get buggy and gross in the sun all day to teach that lesson is a bit much, even for me. I planned on spending the entire week-end getting the house in order. I was supposed to clean out the fridge, clean the kitchen, wipe down the cupboards, pick up and dust the living room and family room, and organize around my work area. I managed to clean the bathroom (all except the floor, which I am ignoring). I have no defense, other than when it came time to do the things I planned on, I didn't FEEL like it. At one point I laid on the couch and whined and pounded my fist a bit and kicked and stuff. It was fun, although not productive. I figure in eight days I will have all day to clean the house, right? I was also supposed to do a butt-load of laundry. DH hogged the machines all week-end washing a towel or two socks and a t-shirt at a time. I whined about that too. He said he would do mine for me when he was done, but the last time I fell for that my laundry disappeared for two weeks and came back smelling mildew because he forgot it in the washing machine for four days. I hate that sour-sat-in-the-washer-too-long smell. Blech. On the brighter side, I think he did start DD's laundry, which is good because she is down to the rippy underwear and this morning she wore a green t-shirt with purple pants and blue socks. She complained, as the colour combo injured her fashion sense. I told her if anybody said anything tell them I dressed her in the dark - tee hee! Then I promised her ice cream after dinner if she shut up about it. Works every time, my friends. I did manage to get the grocery shopping done. Of course, we managed to forget just about everything we needed even though we had a list. Apparently not a good list. We did remember peanut butter, so on the bright side we won't starve to death as long as the bread products hold out. But we did forget toilet paper so I better hide the bran cereal. It was pouring rain when we came out of the store. So I did the only thing I could think of - I ran screaming to the car and jumped in, leaving him to get soaked to the underwear while unloading the bags into the trunk and bringing the cart back. He hates hates hates getting rained on, being wet, or wearing damp clothes. I reminded him that his clothes were NOT damp, but rather soaking. He threatened to make me go to Best Buy and wait while he browsed the movies (I find this the most mind numbing activity ever). I convinced him that I would be appropriately punished even if I waited in the car, so I got to sit and listen to the radio and fog up the windows by simply breathing while he toddered around like an old lady looking for DVD's from his list. Don't think I didn't notice that his movie list is meticulous and contains all the necessary items, unlike our grocery list. No question where the priorities lie here. Of the six meals expected between Saturday and Sunday, I managed to create ONE. And DH had to cook the entire thing on the grill but I am counting it anyway because it is my blog and I make the rules. Well, two if you count reheated leftover macaroni for dinner Saturday (and I have decided it counts, so there). I think that those are pretty good stats considering the amount of time I spent whining and kicking and pounding my fists and stuff. That takes a lot of energy. So much energy that I think I might take a nap instead of lunch today to recover from my busy week-end ;).