Thursday, August 23, 2007

I am considering cheating

Temptation is hard to resist. Does one stick with the same old thing, day in and day out? Or does one go out and seek the new and exciting? Perhaps find something that is lacking at home? Or maybe instead of finding new, what about rediscovering the old? What you have already passed up once or set aside? Is it possible that a spark remains there, buried and hidden but awaiting a bit of breath before bursting into flame? This tank top with it's endless and mindless seed stitch makes me want to start a second project to break up the boredom. Wait a minute, what did you THINK I was talking about????? Get your minds out of the gutter, darlings. Or don't, but leave me out of it ;). I actually found myself starting to doze off last night. I am up to the straps. Well, more specifically the LEFT strap. Then on to the right strap, which is more of what I did for the LEFT strap and that is precisely what makes me long for something more exciting. At this point I am considering knitting MITTENS. And let me tell you, when the thought of knitting a mitten makes you tingle with excitement and it is 90 degrees with 100% humidity outside you KNOW you need a break from what you are doing. Or have a deep and serious problem. Why are you looking at me like that? Bleah. I just ate a flavoured jelly bean that tastes exactly like that orange flavered aspirin gum. Complete with the sour/bitter aspirin after taste. Ew. No more of those until I can look closely at what I am getting. Is it just me, or do grapefruit flavoured jelly beans kind of have an aftertaste of B.O.? Not that I have ever TASTED B.O. But if I had to guess what it tastes like by the smell, that would be it. Word to the wise. Stick to Jelly Bellies. Cheaper brand flavoured beans are just not worth it. They are too grainy and the flavours are off. Plus the map on the back is too blurry to read, and the colours don't remotely match anything inside the package so it is a crap shoot as to what you are getting. If my niece is reading this, it is all your mother's fault. Every time I go over there I can't resist that little dish of jelly bellies. This package of whatever-brand flavoured jelly beans was a direct result of a candy craving that came at the wrong place and the wrong time. I couldn't just show up at your house at midnight, grab a handful, and take off could I? No. And the closest store only had these. Wait a minute, does this make a jelly bean cheater too??????? I need to go lie down and evaluate a few things about the person I have become. Such a shame. Can't even stay loyal to a candy. I see mittens in my immediate future.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Poopy poop poop

That is what today is like. Rainy and cold and poopy. The kind of day that makes you want to wrap yourself in a comfortor and read a good book (or those women's magazines that we all read and hate to admit to) while sipping hot cocoa. Whipped cream and sprinkles optional. Even better if you can convince one or more warm fuzzy house pets to cozy down with you. Warm cats or dogs do wonders for chilled feet. Hamsters are too small to warm an area bigger than your toes, and they don't sit still so they aren't a good choice. Not that I know at all about anything like that *cough*. I would do the above, except it seems like too much work. THAT is the kind of day we are having today. DD is bored even when she is doing something. Ruby wants to go out but doesn't want to get wet, so that translates to pestering me constantly then balking at the cold wetness outside when I open the door for her. I put down a "pee pad" - something we resort to only on days where it seems to rain on end. So far she has pooped on it (after much guilty shuffling around then running to hide after the deed was done) but insists on going outside to pee. Which involves me standing in the rain pointing at the grass and saying "go pee!" a hundred times while she looks very sad and squishy about getting rained on and loathe to step off the wet patio onto the wet grass. If I don't go out with her she refuses to leave the step, and seconds after being let in she wants out again. There is no lesser evil it seems. The cats are hibernating today. Which is a good thing because Xena has been so wild and mischievous lately I was beginning to think DH would blow a gasket. If he moves at night she tries to attack his feet (often managing to sink a single fang into his big toe. DH freaks about things touching his feet, and about being woken up). She gallops across our sleeping bodies, digging her back claws into our flesh to use as a springboard. She stalks Ruby as she sleeps on the pillow, which makes the dog restless and nervous. This disturbs MY sleep because it prompts a snorking dog to plop down directly on my head or sit on my hair. I also caught her peeking at Frankie the other day - a definite no no! On the week-end she was at the top of the stairs, teasing herself with the tip of her own tail. She would wait a bit, then stalk, then attack it. Often she gallumfed in circles chasing it, much like a dog does. At one point she got a bit rambunctious and came tumbling down the stairs head-over-ash-can and landed in a splat of long limbs and tail at the bottom. It looked like somebody had tossed a bucket of tar down the stairs, contents spilling over the carpet. A minute later, she was back at it again jumping at door frames and rattling plastic bags and trying to bite my feet. She needed the rest today, and frankly so did I! Still working on the tank top. I reached a point of the pattern where the directions do not match the stitch count, although the proper stitch count is listed at the end of the row. Something is left out of that line somewhere! So I muddled through it and think I have figured it out. I can't find errata on this pattern because something has happened to the Big Girl Knits website. If there was a problem or misprint I don't know how to find the correction. Poop again. One of my nieces has requested slippers. She wanted to buy some and her mother suggested she ask me for some. My mother thinks I should teach the child how to knit a pair. I am not such a great knitting teacher. I could help her after she got going with the basics, but I just cannot teach people from scratch. DD tries, and can get a few stitches in before something bad happens. But she gets frustrated with me because I can't seem to help or show her how to do it right. This is a hard blow for somebody like me, because generally I am very good at developing training modules. They cover all the ways to learn a skill (visually, text, demonstration, repetitive practice, and so on). But still, I cannot teach somebody to knit. So I will make the slippers once I decide on a pattern and yarn that a pre-teen will find acceptable. And to make the day even poopier, an insurance company has coerced my husband to make an appointment "to review our coverage needs" tonight. I was pretty ticked off. We already have coverage, and I am not buying any more insurance right now. It pisses me off that now we have to sit in this stupid meeting and I will have to be the strong one because DH will just sit there detached and wait for me to respond to each question. When the sales pitch starts, DH just looks at me, so they focus their pressure towards ME at that point sensing I make the final decisions. It just makes me so mad. How hard is it to just say "sorry we are not interested" and end the call? What a waste of time. But if I don't go, who knows what they will convince him to buy? Craptastic, I tell you. Which reminds me, if I don't get the pork tenderloins in the oven they won't be ready for dinner.